Sunday, September 27, 2009

Productivity: It's not all that's it's cracked up to be

It's 4:24 and the most productive thing I've done is recharge my iPhone battery....and I'm ok with that!

I'm still fighting my cold with a sore throat that won't go away. Today we've added itchy eyes, a cough and more sniffles. I know, it's just a cold so I'll stop being such a whiner. The thing that's bothering me the most is the fatigue! I've been a couch potato today, watching videos and eating as if I were at my goal weight! So, once again, I seem to have lost all self-control. I'm trying not to get annoyed with myself, but I now realize I must do something drastic in order to regain my will power. I think I have the idea, too.

OK, so this is going to be my wackiest adventure of all. Many of you will think I'm going to an extreme and some of you will want to have me put into a rubber room in a straight jacket, but hear me out....

So, in my last workout with The Evil One, he asked me how my eating was going and, once again, I was unable to answer that I was back on track. It seems like it's the story of my life lately. He made a suggestion that I thought was...well...psychotic. At first, I fought it tooth and nail, but as I was being tortured in the workout the idea started to grow on me ... like a bad fungus ... or a ingrown toenail. So I started to ask questions, still unconvinced, but I could feel my mind opening up a bit. Now, I guess I'm in full & total acceptance of the idea since I'm about to share with you my latest dietary expedition....ready?

Drumroll, please....

Starting Oct. 1st, I will eat NOTHING BUT organic chicken and organic brown rice for 21 days. I know what you're thinking ... "she's finally lost it." ... "the lack of carbs has consumed her sanity"...I hear ya...and feel ya. But let's just take a moment to think about this....

PROS:
- it's only for 21 days
- I'm told I will shed "a TON" of weight and fat
- it's only for 21 days
- when I finish the end of this 21 days, I will have reclaimed my self-control
- really, it's only 21 days!

CONS:
- I will be clucking by the end of the 21 days
- it's THREE WEEKS, for the love of God!
- I get to eat carbs...even if it is only brown rice
- I'll become more creative in how I cook chicken

I won't get scurvy from not eating vegetables in 21 days (believe me, I checked). I just need to eat my multi-vitamins.

Doesn't this sound exciting?!? I'm thinking the timing is good because I'll have been on this for 9 days before the Thanksgiving weekend, so I'll be in my "zone" and disciplined. And it ends just before I head to Phoenix for a glorious Lebanese dinner cooked by Mona ... a great reward!

I'm kinda keen on this and, almost excited. I really do need a jump start again and I think this the way to go...challenging, but at the end of it, extremely rewarding!

Allrighteythen....on that note...until Wednesday, my poppits, eat well!! BTW, if anyone wants to join me in this adventure, feel free to let me know!!
(a) yt xox

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Sniffles...a sore throat ... fatigue ... a fever...

all that equals a big, "uh-oh" for me. I'm down with a cold...dang! I'm fighting it and find myself sleeping alot, so I guess it's all good but I really hate being sick. Poor me, eh?!? So, I'll stop whining now. You may want to NOT see me in person for the next few days, if you don't want to be sick....

For some reason, I've been thinking about my dad alot lately. Sunday night I was having a series of really bad dreams ... like CSI or Criminal Minds kinda dreams...it wasn't fun. I kept waking myself up just to stop the drama that were my dreams! The last one I remember was of a memory of when I was 5 and vomited. At that age, getting sick was not fun and quite scary, so I remember crying after I'd puked outside the bathroom (that's right! Didn't even make it to the toilet - not sure who had to clean that up!!). Anyway, my dad scooped me up and brought me to the recliner where he cuddled me and sang "Too-ra-loo-ra-loo-ra" a la Bing Crosby. I just remembered feeling completely peaceful, safe and calm while cocooned in my dad's lap. That was the memory I finally fell asleep to Sunday night. It was a great feeling.

Yesterday, I was standing on the GO Train platform and noticed a bunch of squirrels hanging out in a tree. It was like the party tree for squirrels...they were coming and going like crazy. At one point, I counted 6 squirrels in this tree and I couldn't figure out what was going on. Then I saw a squirrel come away from the tree with three nuts in its mouth and I realized it wasn't the party tree but rather the food bank for squirrels! I was reminded of my dad again. I was in high school and he was into telling me corny jokes. I remember sitting at the dining room table at dinner with my mom, dad and brother, Chuck. The conversation went as follows:

Dad: Yvonne, they're looking for you.
me: Who?
Dad: The squirrels. They're gathering nuts!!

Cut to dad laughing like crazy with a twinkle in his eye...and mom smirking and looking at dad shaking her head, yet a little proud...Chuck groaning yet smiling that his dad made a funny...and me rolling my obnoxious teenage eyes feeling like "what EVER, dad"...

Interestingly enough, that memory roused by watching squirrels in a tree, triggered thoughts about three people once in my life who are now gone. I'm not sure what this means, but it's kinda peaceful for me. I'm feeling like I'm being watched and protected.

Well, except for my workout yesterday....

Clearly none of these "protectors" were with me as The Evil One was torturing me with my toughest workout ever. Yeesh! There was no mercy and it didn't stop. At one point, my heart was pounding so much I thought it was going to come out of my chest and just fall onto the sled I was pulling. I did the legs first, toggling between the leg press and this other torture machine. In between, I pulled the (insert expletive here) sled. That's when I thought my heart was going to beat out of my chest. THEN we went to the arms...yippee! At the end of the arms, I was doing that STUPID (more expletives) plank exercise where I had to hold myself straight balancing on my arms and toes. By the end of the plank, my whole body was shaking and I could barely lift myself up from the mat. And sweaty?!? Oie!!!

So, what's the lesson here? It's good for me and I need to do the work, so I should just SUCK IT UP!!! But at least I can whine about it, right? Thanx for letting me vent...

OK, I need to go to sleep now. I hope this makes sense. Who knows what my infected mind has been typing...

Can you say "Drama Queen" boys & girls?!?

G'night poppits! Wash those hands....
(a) yt xox

Monday, September 21, 2009

"DOH!!"

That's what I said this morning when I realized I didn't update my blog yesterday! Yes, Emmanuel sent out his blog with diligence, but did that trigger ME to update my blog?!? Nooooo....zoinks! Sorry folks....

I have lots to tell, having completed my third and final week of the Adler coaching course. It was a bitter sweet ending, come Friday. On the one hand, I was happy to be finished the course work and move into the practicum stage. On the flip side, I was bummed that I won't be in class with my Adler peeps anymore. I really enjoyed the learning - both my own self-learning as well as the learning of my peers. It's always amazing and humbling to hear of the self-discovery. Everyone's so open and honest, it's pretty cool!

We learned more coaching techniques for our "tool kit"...lots of creative stuff going on, including some improve exercises! Those who know me from my Second City days, can only imagine how much I enjoyed THESE tactics! We also did some visioning and metaphor work. It got my imagination working overtime and I had all kinds of images popping into my head! Fortunately, none of the images were violent or ugly...says the person who has "fantasies" of pushing people with Cinnabons onto the GO Train platform! I guess it's all relative...:)

ANYWAY....

I'd like to tell you about one of my "insights". There is an exercise where you "transform a metaphor" from a negative into a positive image. The image I had was one of a dog chasing it's tail. This is the image I get when I think about the two, looming deadlines approaching me...when my severance runs out and May 2010 when I climb the Inca Trail. Ever watch a dog when it's chasing it's tail? It's like they can't stop..."I'm gonna get it, I'm gonna get it"...even though it bounces off the wall from the dizziness and yelps when it actually bites the tail. You just want to say to the dog..."just stop, dough head!!!" That's how I feel sometimes when I think about these two, big goals...excited about the goal (i.e. financial success with ymt Strategies and reaching the top of The Inca Trail). However, I see myself getting dizzy and panicky ... bouncing off the walls and wanting to stop. Are ya with me or have you now flipped to checking your email?!?

So, I transformed this image into something more positive...I'm a dog, laying in it's cozy bed, eating and drinking when I'm hungry...getting a treat every once in a while...being unconditionally loved and loving unconditionally...playing in the park with other dogs, chasing balls, sniffing bums...all happy! This a much better image and instantly calms me down...well, except for the sniffing bums ...

So, I've recommitted to chillaxin' and enjoying the park! And would love your support and reminders when you see me chasing my tail. Interestingly enough, I received an email from my niece. It's about a woman who dines with an 80 year old woman who orders dessert and fattening things for lunch. When asked, the 80 year old went on about how she's old and wants to live her life to the fullest before she dies. My niece specifically sent it to me 'cuz I'm sure she was trying to tell me to "chillax and eat chocolate every once in a while!". It's a good message and one I will take to heart. Thanx Sandra for caring!!

BTW, I'm watching the Oprah Winfrey show where she's interviewing Whitney Houston. She's showing lots of images from Whitney's career and it's reminding me of the glorious 80s...the days of big hair, double shoulder pads...my, how I miss the football player look!! To this day, I still appreciate a good mullet!

Well, on that note, I'll say "buh-bye" ... see you Wednesday!
(a) yt xox

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

All I can say is....

!!!! HOLY FATIGUE, BATMAN !!!!

Between the class and the Film Festival...oie! I know, I know..."puh-leez princess"... OK, I'll stop whining and tell you all the good stuff going on!

Let's start with class...it's awesome! The instructor, Lydia, is way cool...she's smart, got great business experience, let's us experiment, appreciates our diversity and guides us. With her, it's all about us and I like that. She's got a good sense of humour, too, so that really helps. Most of the people in the class I know, but there are a few new people I've met. We're all pretty different but we have a common interest and passion for coaching. We're learning some new, cool techniques..more "tools" for our tool kit. It's all good and we're having alot of fun, too. It's a good group of people.

Now, let's talk TIFF...I've seen three films and every one of them were awesome! Sunday night was a German film called "Same Same but Different". It starred David Kross (from The Reader) and it was about a German guy who goes on vacation in Cambodia, meets and falls in love with a prostitute. It was really good and the performances were very strong! Monday night was a French movie called "Partir", starring a SIZZLING Kristin Scott Thomas. She was a woman in a bad marriage then has an affair with a steamy Spanish builder guy...yummy! Her hubby became obsessed with getting her back and got all crazy. It was really good and Kristin is a great actress. Tomorrow is an English romantic comedy. It should be fun! I must admit to being a bit disappointed in not seeing any of the major galas. I'm a big star gazer and miss the action of the red carpet! I suppose I should just be happy I've seen good movies and shut my pie hole!

Speaking of "pie"...did I mention that my cravings and wild ass fantasies are back...like a recent one where I was locked in a Starbucks and I ate every one of their baked goods...with latte chasers...oh my, it was wonderful. Just me and the carbs...mmm.....

Despite my cravings and obsessions, I've managed to stay on track this week. No exercising, though but I haven't been home. This weekend and next week I'm going to be on track for that. I'm slowly getting back into my groove. I'm trying to stop beating myself up for blowing it in Alaska. Really, what can I do about it now. Anyway, enough of this...time to focus on moving forward. I've got so many good things going on, so I just need to enjoy the ride.

I thought I'd end the blog with words of The Warrior...'cuz I just feel like it!

Ways of the Warrior
I am a warrior;
I create every moment of my life
My choices are my reality
My response creates my outcome
There is no can't; I choose to or choose not to
There is no try; I do or I do not do
I am true to my own heart
I speak my truth...with compassion
I keep my commitments
I approve of myself...now
I don't have to please everybody
I don't take anything personally
I understand that how others judge me is about them
I look 'em in the eye; I tell 'em who I am & if they don't like it __ 'em!

G'night poppits!
(a) yt xox

Sunday, September 13, 2009

I've got stars on my mind...

Hi everyone! Well, we've had some glorious weather these past few days and I'd like to think it's to impress the stars and papparazzi whipping around our fair city this week. You see, it's that time of year again...no, not back to school (even though I do have class next week)....not fall...no, it's The Toronto International Film Festival, or "TIFF" if you're in the know!

For those of you who have known me for some time, you know that this is one of my most favourite times of the year - second only to the Christmas season. I admit that I get into the glitz and glam of all the stars (see my Facebook for pics from last year) and the good movies. I have been pretty lucky, seeing alot of really great movies and many fun stars (remind me to tell you of how I met my old boyfriend, Johnny Depp). This is my 11th year attending TIFF and I've only see a handful of really crappy movies, including one with Hugh Jackman. I don't really count that as too bad because Hugh is just good eye candy so a really bad plot can be overlooked when you're staring at his naked chest.

I bought a Globetrotter's pass again this year, which means I get to see 7 flicks in locations around the city. I went with Sandra, Joanne and Deborah Friday night to see our first film. It was GREAT! An Irish/UK film starring Cillian Murphy (from Red Eye where he was creepy), Jim Broadbent (Bridget Jones' dad & Slughorn in Harry Potter #6) and Brendan Gleeson (Mad Eye Moody in Harry Potter). It was funny, edgy, riveting with a really good plot and good acting. We all gave it a high on our rating scale! At the end of the movie, Ian (director), Cillian and Brendan (we're on a first name basis now) stayed after and did a little Q&A. It was all very nice and I was glad I got a chance to see it. Tonight, I'm off to see a German movie with David Kross, the young guy in The Reader. It looks like a romantic-ish drama. Anyway, it should be interesting!

The eating has been much better for me. Although I still have cravings, I've been able to dodge several food bullets, including resisting some yummy looking desserts at Marg's baby shower today. Oie! That was a difficult one. It was carbs central, so I ended up eating two helpings of the salad, carrots & celery with a spinach dip and cheese. Not the best of choices, but much better than the 12 desserts I wanted to inhale....or the yummy looking wraps...or the awesome looking sandwiches on croissants and foccachia...see my hell?!?

Yesterday I went to Stratford with Lorry & Dianne, in honour of Dianne's birthday. We went to Rheo Tompson...AMAZING mint smoothie chocolates ... and Rocky Mountain. Both were candy heaven for me and I wanted to eat everything in the store....I'm talkin' "EVERYTHING". I did break down and have a sampler mint smoothie and piece of fudge, but I'm proud of myself for resisting everything else I wanted to buy! It's sad, but "The Rationalizer" is back...ya know, the voice inside my head that can justify eating ANYTHING?!? Well, I don't like it. I understand I have alot of making up for the sins of the Alaskan cruise, so I must go through this torment again. Yeesh...all a good lesson. And to think that the food on the cruise wasn't really all that worth it! Now, if I was pigging out on Stone Cold Creamery ice cream everyday for 2 weeks, I'd at least be facing The Rationalizer with a smile on my face. But noooooooooooo.....

Well, tomorrow is the third and final week of class for my course. It's bitter sweet for me. On the one hand, it shows great progress towards the end of this journey. On the flip side, however, is that it will be the last classroom experience I will have at Adler. Which is a bit of a bummer 'cuz I like that environment. It just means I'm going to have to make sure I keep good tabs & in touch with the Adler peeps I've made, like Maggie, Victoria, Josie, Marc, Michael, Shauna & Svetlana.

Well poppits, it's time to sign off and get ready for TIFF. My boyfriend-but-he-doesn't-know-it-yet George Clooney is in town, so I need to pretty up!

See you Wednesday!!
(a) yt xox

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Although "Consistency" isn't my middle name...

"Avoidance" certainly could be! That would be what I'm doing by typing this blog instead of doing some school reading...sigh...

It's a Wednesday...at 11:00 pm ... and I've decided to take a stand. No more random-do-it-when-I-feel-like-it posts...nuh-uh....no siree bub...not for me! My friend Emmanuel (aka Motivator Man) has committed to updating his blog every Sunday and Wednesday with his Motivator Man tips. Well, I've decided I should commit to twice/week too. So, I've chosen the same days as Emmanuel to update my blog? Why?!? Because getting the Motivator Man email will trigger me to update my blog...clever, isn't it?!? Or, maybe just lazy...WHAT-EVER!!

I'm continuing my high with life and I'm happy to report it is neither caffeine nor sugar induced. Au contraire, mes amies. I've been following my diet very well since last I typed. I still have the temptations to buy treats but have resisted. And yes, random cookie boxes and ice cream bars call my name, BUT I RESIST!!! AND, I've exercised twice this week and heading to my third LPS workout tomorrow....all's good on that front, so yeah for me!

I should mention, since I'm on the topic of "workouts", there was a really kinda cheesy guy working out today. He started by winking at me as he hopped onto the bike beside me. Then he had the NERVE to yell at me "harder, harder" as I was pulling the (insert expletive here) sled along the floor. Can you believe it?!? If I wasn't struggling to breathe and not pass out, I would've given him a dirty look. Well, at least I did in my mind anyway!! Who did he think he was?!? I took satisfaction in seeing him grunt, sweat and almost pass out as Clance guided him through his torture/workout. I'm hoping Clance worked him extra hard for minding my business...that'll teach him....heh, heh, heh...Oh my...can you say "vindictive" boys & girls?!?

My training with The Evil One has been modified. I think I mentioned that we now do all legs, then all arms (vs. one leg, one arm; another leg, another arm). This is so much harder for me. I really liked the break the legs got by going to the arm exercises. However, according to Werner, it is SUPPOSED to be harder...duh! And the "good news" is that I've reached a point of strength where I can tolerate it. Oh goodee. I know it's all good for me and my progress is positive and yada-yada...but...owee...my bum hurts....and my legs...and my arms...

OK, The Ambassador of Positivity is back....the coaching stuff is just FAB-U-LUSS!! I met a new client today who is just an absolute delight! I'm really looking forward to working with her as I think we will work well together. AND, I had my first peer coaching session with one of my Adler buddies. To be honest, I was a bit intimidated by him - he's smart and confidant and a really good coach - so I was wondering just what the heck I could do for him. Wellllllll, I'm thinkin' it's gonna be good! I decided to tell my inner critic to "shut the HECK up!!!" and approached the conversation with a curiousity (to get to know him better), excitement (about stepping up my coaching game) and a chilliaxed frame of mind! After all, he puts his pants on one leg at a time, too! Anyway, I think it's gonna be just fine for both of us, so I'm looking forward to our next session!

I'm really looking forward to my third week of class next week. It's the week where, according to the notes, "Everything gets pulled together". That'll be cool! Plus, beginning my practicum will also be good. I have our first practicum call tomorrow...after I meet with Motivator Man for coffee. We're off to the Starbucks at the BCE where we get our fill of caffeine & business suits! It's a lively location (the busiest one in Canada) and the energy is just buzzing!

Well, it's time for this one to get her beauty sleep! Don't forget to take your leap, poppits!!
(a) yt xox

Monday, September 7, 2009

Should one actually do work on Labour Day?

Or would you be violating some kind of ethical or moral code?!? I'll do anything to get out of housework....yeesh!

Hello poppits! It's been far too long. A big part of the problem is that I have not been able to connect to the internet for at least 4 days now. Oh sure, I'm doing it now, but that's because I had to go to a Rogers store, get a new modem and steal the wireless network from some poor soul who hasn't figured out there are pirates who will steal his wireless network. I'm guessing it's a male, because the network on which I ride is called...and I kid you not ... "Tits4Dinner". See why I think it's a male? Hey! I'm not hear to judge, but rather I'd like to thank Mr. Exotic Dinner Choice for not locking his internet connection.

So the week has been a bit of an up and down emotionally for me. It started with a great AFOOFA meeting where I joined up after having missed the last 2 weeks. It was just Aubrey, Duane, Joanne, Jeff & I, but the conversation was quite inspirational. I then did a Myers-Briggs coaching session with Jeff, which always gets my mojo going! Aubrey, Duane & I had lunch and those guys just know how to motivate by simply believing in you! Needless to say, I was feeling pretty darn good by the time we walked out of the Apricot Tree and I headed home.

Then it started to happen...the events that triggered self-doubt, nervousness and yes, self-pity!

I had a message from a "Nancy" from the Employment Insurance office. For those who don't know, I'm "sucking it up" and applying for EI so I can get some dough coming in. Ya know, it all goes back to my "safety net" of cash flow. Well, in speaking with the ever pleasant, Nancy, I spoke the truth...no, I had not been looking for full-time work because I was pursuing my business. Well, spank my bottom and call me "stupid" because that was just the wrong thing to do. Needless to say my application was declined. So, I have gained alot of learning about the whole EI process, which, by the way, is NOT made clear on the website. There is alot of very valuable information about the process I learned, not from the government itself, but from friends who had gone through the process - very disappointing! Anyway, I'm going to appeal my claim and I will put in an effort to find full time work. After all, if I could find a job where I'm coaching full-time, why would I turn it down?!?

So, that sent me into a bit of a tail spin....self-doubt about pursuing a career change ... fear of never making any money on this career ... resignation that I would have to go back to working full time in project delivery or marketing ... etc. etc. OK, so I'm a bit of a drama queen, but it was a struggle for me.

Then, the clouds parted and the sun came out.

I was given a free ticket to Julius Ceasar in Stratford, so I road-tripped with Tony's girlfriend Carol. It was great getting to know her better and I'm SO HAPPY she's come into Tony's life. They're awesome for each other and he certainly deserves someone so wonderful. Anyway, Carol and I hung out in the Avon Theatre Store where I saw a plaque that said "LEAP and the net will appear". It was like a gentle smack upside the head, reminding me of the importance of my leap of faith.

THEN...oh yeah, it gets better people ...

I picked up the mail and got my first cheque for ymt Strategies from the gig I did in Chatham. Yeah!

THEN I got TWO referrals for paid coaching gigs ... and THEN (can you stand it?!?)

Barb (transition coach extraordinaire - remember her from my FelixGlobal days?) contacted me and spoke to me about training with her to take on some career transition clients and, possibly, including me as an associate on her website! How cool is that?!? That's like my nirvana...being mentored by someone I respect and getting referrals from other coaches...for coaching!! It's awesome!

Sooooooo.....I've stepped away from that ledge to which I've recently been clinging and am falling gloriously to the ground. Once again, I don't know where I'll land or when I'll get there, but I know that the wonderful feeling of the air on my face as I free fall towards something great is back and I LOVE IT!!!

Join me, poppits, in this glorious state of risk-taking! Is there something you've always wanted to do but didn't know how it would turn out? Just go for it...seriously...It's an amazing feeling. And remember....

LEAP and the net will appear

TTFN!
(a) yt xoxo