I have had ENOUGH!!!

Yes, that's about where I'm at right now. "What, dearest most beautiful yt is causing your frustration?", you ask...gosh! I'm blushing...But seriously...

It has nothing to do with my journey to good health this time. The 5 lb. weight loss was a fraud brought on my 3 days of the flu (if ya know what I mean). I am, however, down 2 lbs. from 2 weeks ago, so I consider that a very good thing...20 lbs away from my end of July goal and 44 lbs in total. I'm ok with this, truthfully, as I only exercised (hard core at LPS) once last week with my back, my remnants of the flu (if ya know what I mean), my general funk...blah, blah, blah....

ANYWAY, I have no complaints about my journey to good health, although I could use a really big ass ice cream cone.....no, my latest frustration is related to my "journey to good organization"...a journey that is far more painful and challenging than my one to good health, truth be told. So, here I sit typing in my blog to avoid looking at my apartment! Let me tell you how my journey began...

Yesterday I went out and bought a few things to better organize myself...a file box so I don't have all my files laying on the spare bed; hanging file folders in which to place the files; a letter sorter so I can reclaim my counter for cooking and not mail storage; and a "industrial strength" rolling garment rack. It's schwanky...2-tiered, big-ass wheels that actually roll, solid, sturdy poles to support the clothes that will be rolled into the coat closet (it's huge!) making way for spiffy storage solutions in my spare bedroom closet. See, I've got plans for organizing myself and today I was MOTIVATED BABY!! Until I encountered a hitch...I cant' seem to put the (insert five expletives here) garment rack together....argh....Those of you who know me, know I simply can NOT put these things together, even if there is a really good diagram to show me how...although, how many of you have encountered a clear diagram that actually is actually legible? See? I rest my case...

So, here I sit, my apartment in shambles, disassembled garment rack taking over my couch...winter/fall clothes taking over my bedroom hooks...stuff from the coat closet taking over the rest of the living area having been cleaned out to make room for the garment rack...that sits unassembled on my couch. Get the picture?!?

!!!!!!!!!!!!! CALGON, TAKE ME AWAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If anyone has any talent in this area and is willing to walk through the battlefield that is my apartment to come help me, I'd be MOST grateful!! As a matter of fact, that will earn you the title of "Hero of the Day"...a most auspicious honour...Please I'm begging here....

OK, enough whining...it's a gorgeous day outside and there are 4 of the cutest dogs running around the park across the street. I simply MUST watch them now.

I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward to a normal week of workout, healthy eating and chillaxin'! I can do so much to ignore the disaster around me...like never coming home...

Shout out to birthday celebrants this week - awesome cousin, Kelly & awesome friend, Thom.

Thanx for letting me vent, poppits!
(a) yt xox

I'm baaaaaaack!!!

Well, almost!

Hello & heidi-ho on this GLORIOUS Friday-before-a-long-weekend! The sun is shining, the trees and flowers are in bloom, the kids are screaming like banshees in the park across the street...ah, spring is definitely here!

Thanx to a long, brisk walk and good talk with cousin Sandra last night, I'm feeling like my old self. Although the back is still twingy and I still have remnants of the flu bug (if ya know what I mean), my funk has lifted and I feel more energetic today than I have for the whole week....yeah!!! I hate funk...well, unless it's a good 80's tune where you can "get down on it"!!

So, true confessions time. I have not been following my diet very well this week. For the most part, I've been eating the right foods, but the eating window has been really off. Mostly I've been eating before 11:30. This week has been a real struggle for me. I had wicked cravings, as mentioned in my last blog about Planet Organic's bulk food ordeal. I'm lucky I didn't have the energy to actually go to the grocery store or else I would've purchased everything in sight and eaten it on the spot. I have a visual of me, greasy hair & sweats, sitting in the frozen food section with a tub of Heavenly Hash, an open bag of plastic spoons to the left of me, and crumbs from an empty bag of Double Stuff Oreos on my right. Oh sure, I'd pay for the eaten food, but not until I've mouth-vacuumed every last crumb from the aisle and cleaned up the chocolate mustache on my face. This is how bad it got....

BUT, it's over and I'm back...yeah!! I've decided not to step on the scale until my usual weigh-in day of Monday morning (Tuesday for LPS). That way, I can keep the positive momentum going! Today I will work out in some way. I'm not sure if I can take the physical stress of an LPS workout just yet, but I will get some exercise. I'm thinking treadmill or bike ride....whatever will be will be!

I promised myself to try and get my house organized for when I get it painted the last week of May. It's going to be a challenge. Although I'll have good intentions, I think I'll end up throwing everything into the centre of the rooms and hope for the best...oie! I did manage to check out sleeping/sitting options in IKEA to see what could be done to organize the space. I'm pretty sure I'm gonna need help with that. However, at the very least, I will shift winter wardrobe to spring/summer wardrobe this weekend. That, in itself, will be challenging!

BTW, I think I mentioned that I'm reading "The BlackBerry Diaries"...the latest book by Kathy Buckworth. Folks, if you are a parent, a BlackBerry owner or both, this book is for you. I am neither (I have an iPhone), but love it! In her July 20th entry, she's been speaking about her vacation in France with her hubby, 4 children and Seamus, her BlackBerry - yes, she named her BlackBerry and is truly, a kindred spirit! She talks about the advantage of having her BB as a means of distraction throughout the book. However, when her BB was out of range in France, she remembers that her children also serve as a great distraction. Check this out...

Children have a delightful way of lowering the tone of any stuffy and pretentious outing....I miss my children in situations where I'm forced to nod, smile politely and not say "you're kidding, right?"at inappropriate times. Like, for example, the recent dinner party where I had someone quite earnestly say to me "Some of the best moments of my life are defined by the wine that I'm drinking." In my own ever-so-sophisticated "best moment", I practically blew my cab merlot all over the finely laid table (out my nose, of course), while sputtering in disbelief. If only I'd had a toddler in tow! I could've pointed to the little darling and said, "Oh sorry - didn't mean to do that - it's just that Nicholas shoved a lima bean up his nose and I couldn't help myself." Instead, I said, "Some of my worst moments are defined by the gallons of wine I've quaffed down the night before."

She kills me! Get the book...seriously!

OK poppits, time to sign off and get busy with the day! Happy Victoria Day weekend to all the crazy Canucks who are reading this blog!
(a) yt xox

Hump Day blues

Hi all! Despite the FAB, sunny day, I'm feeling in a bit of a funk. I'm not sure why, but I know that it's getting annoying, truth be told. I still have traces of my flu (if ya know what I mean) and my energy is really low. Perhaps a nice bike ride could shake me up.

OK, enough whining....

So, it's been a fairly calm two days, since last I typed. The food thing has been in control, although yesterday was a tough day. I went into my favourite health food store, Planet Organic, and kept hovering around the bulk food section. I REALLY wanted to eat something "bad"...like chocolate covered, toffee almonds...or dark chocolate covered blueberries ... or this lovely mix of different flavoured-covered pretzels (like peanut butter, chocolate, yogurt, etc.)...or mini peanut butter cups. I wanted something decadant in a BAD way and felt planted in the ground. Like, my feet wouldn't move. For some reason, the message from my brain to "get the hell out of here" was not reaching my feet and I couldn't move. Anyway, you'll be happy to know that, eventually, I did move without scoring any of the chocolate treats. I did, however, pick up some chicken wings at Loblaws and snarfed them down, so I'm not sure what was the lesser of the evils - chocolate or fatty chicken wings! Some days, ya just gotta be a rebel...

I've been feeling really unmotivated, sleeping in late and just being lazy. So today, I decided to get off my fat arse and do something productive. I'm happy to say it's been a fairly good morning. This afternoon I'm off to IKEA to get some ideas on how to "deal with" my spare bedroom. I should get busy on that one since I've got someone coming in at the end of the month to paint my condo!

I think I'll sign off by reminding myself of my goals....
- 22 lbs. by the end of July (that's 2 lbs/week)
- hard core LPS exercise 3x/week
- yt exercise (like bike or treadmill) 1x/week
- no grains, sugars, dairy, fruit, or chocolate covered, toffee almonds for 14 days..until my next cheat day!

Oh yeah. And to be the friggin' Ambassador of Positivity even if it kills me!
Cheers, poppits!
(a)yt xox

Monday, Monday...

Anybody remember that song?!?

Well heidi ho, people! Long time, no write eh? As you can see the heading of my blog has been updated to reflect my new goals...thanx to cousin Angie baby for the reminder and to Evil One for updating!

Well, it's about 4:00 Monday afternoon and I am sitting in the gym after a self-directed workout. This time I got to lift the @!)#$*%^^! sandbag TEN times as I walked one way across the gym floor. yes, you read that correctly, TEN drops one-way. Oh, I had so much fun..really! I could only do 6 reps, but I was quite glad I did 6. They were really hard! Anyway, despite breaking 2 nails on my right hand (including bending back one of those nails to the point where I now have a bruise and significant pain) I have survived. Gloria Gaynor should sing about THAT!

It was an interesting weekend. I'm sure I'm still battling the flu, this time with the added fun of stomach cramps...lovely, isn't it?!? Did that stop me from going out for dinner and to a concert Saturday night? No way, baby! I went out with Vincent and cousin Sandra where we had dinner at an Italian restaurant and then went to the Glenn Gould Studio for an AMAZING concert of three, young Russian musicians..or should I say "ROCK STARS"!! The pianist was 17; the violinist was 18 and the clarinetist (?) was 18. The audience was full of young adults who expressed their support with a few whoops and cheers! It was nice to see and they were amazingly talented.

After the concert, I went home and still had bad stomach cramps. Since I'd had them since Friday night, my over-active imagination went to the dark side, assuming I was ridden with cancer and the stomach cramps were the final stages of some wild ass cancer that creeps up on you and overtakes your body. It didn't help that I'd been watching Season One of Gray's Anatomy, I'm sure. So, I contacted the toll-free nurse's hotline to see if I was being melodramatic or if, indeed, I was in stage 4 of a rare cancer. I REALLY wanted the nurse to laugh at me, tell me I had the flu and to verbally abuse me for wasting her time. So, you can imagine my surprise when she said that I should see a doctor within the next 4 hours or run the risk of "something more serious" developing. OK, it was the "more" serious that got me. I mean, what did she mean by "more"? Was what I had serious already? and a serious WHAT?!?

Well, with the stomach pain increasing by the milisecond (after all, it could now be MORE serious), I contacted my sister, Lorry, to see if she'd drop me at the nearest hospital. It would also be good to be close to family in my dying hours, anyway. So, trooper Lorry picked my up and dropped me at the hospital emergency room. After seeing every one of the hospital staff - nurses, doctors, security, cleaners - wearing a mask, I decided to let her off the hook by suggesting that she go home and I call her when I'm ready to go. Since I was already dying of cancer, I thought I'd spare her the trials and tribulations of the swine flu. I mean, who knows how many of those people had come into contact, either directly or indirectly, with someone from Mexico?!? For those of you who know my sister, Lorry, you know she would've been HAPPY with that suggestion and wouldn't let the proverbial door hit her on the ass on the way out!

ANYWAY, after waiting 4 hours (11:30 pm to 3:30 am) I left the emergency room feeling like a total BONEHEAD. Apparently, I did NOT have cancer. And according to the doctor, I didn't really even need to come in! Here's a little tip, people, if the nurse on the 1-800-ima-fake hotline tells you to see a doctor within 4 hours, use your discretion. AND, btw, assume that discretion is not objective if you've been watching Grey's Anatomy, House, or any of the CSI shows...seriously.

On a more positive note, I finished up my 21 days of my modified Caveman Diet Saturday and start the next wave of my food adventure. So, I am still owed my "cheat meal", which we've set up as a lunch on May 20th. BUT my new eating pattern is as follows:
- no sugar, grains, dairy or fruit for 14 days
- 1 full cheat DAY!
- no sugar, grains, dariy, or fruit for 14 days
- 1 cheat day
...see the pattern....

This is pretty cool as I get a WHOLE DAY to enjoy lattes...and chocolate ... and fruit...and chocolate... and yogurt...and chocolate...YEAH! And, by the way, my first cheat day falls on the 24th of this month... my birthday! How cool is that?!?

Well, I'm off to meet Henry for dinner and a coaching session. I hope you were able to enjoy this FAB weather!

Cheers, poppits!
(a)yt xox

Thursday, May 7th 2009

Greetings & salutations! It's Thursday evening and I feel like bloggin'...who's with me?!?

I'm happy to report all flu-like symptoms (if ya know what I mean) are gone and I'm feeling back to my normal self, although a tich tired from popping awake at 3:14 this morning and not going back to sleep - annoying, to say the least.

Yesterday (Wednesday) was a pretty good day. I met Mike for lunch and he got me all pumped up about my "new" bike. So I took it for a spin after lunch, and discovered it needed some tuning up and, of course, accessories!!! So, the bike spent the rest of the afternoon in the shop, while I napped on my couch. Poor me. I did, however, pick it up and take it for a spin in the evening. I rode to Holly's house, then back home. All in all, I rode for about 20 minutes, but it was just to see if I could actually ride it without falling and/or making an ass of myself - mission accomplished! So, I'm looking forward to taking it out for a nice ride along the lake shore this weekend. Here's hoping the weather holds up...

Today I went into the city and did a work out at LPS. Ouch...really. That (insert expletive here) sandbag kept falling all over, so I could really feel the strain in my upper body just to hold the thing. It was quite annoying and I was especially ticked off when a bunch of sand came out of the bag onto my neck & chestal areas....the neck & chestal areas covered in sweat and already hot from exertion...get the picture?!? It was a groady shower, indeed...

When I came home tonight, I rode up in the elevator with the guy who carried one of the baby food bags. Remember him? Well, he'd just come from working out, so I got a chance to see what he really looked like. Honestly, I don't know how he managed to carry the bag of baby food. This guy could fit his entire body into ONE of my pant legs...seriously...he's that small. Oh sure, he has a couple of wicked tatts, but really, he was itty-bitty...bless his wee heart! Thank goodness I wasn't carrying anything heavy 'cuz he looked pretty bagged from his workout. Chivalry is not dead, people, it just happens to live in older, skinny men!

Tomorrow I'm back down to LPS to fight with the sandbag again. It's a bit disappointing as I really don't like to venture into the city on a Friday. However, I did miss Monday's session and I signed that friggin' "contract" with The Evil One, so I have no choice. Although Vincent had a good suggestion to tell him "buzz off I'm riding my bike instead". That Vincent is so good with words!

Well, time to go to bed. I'm struggling with staying awake.

TGIF, baby, TGIF!!!
(a) yt xox

Wednesday, May 6th, 2009

I know what you're thinking.."has it been a week already?!?" Well, no, weisenheimer. I'm just feelin' like I wanna share some good news.

OK, thanx to a bug that's been attacking me, causing all food I eat to go through me like a tornado, I'm down 5 lbs...5.5 lbs according to the LPS scale. I'm semi-excited about this number ONLY because I'm not sure it's gonna last - ya know, once the bug goes away. After 2 days of ... um ... elimination ... I'm starting to see some...er...calming. I know, it's a disgusting thought, but at least I'm delicate in my language! So, I figure if I eat responsibly and continue with the exercising, I will show a decrease in weight next week. We'll see by how much. In the meantime, I'm riding the skinny wave, baby!! This loss puts me....

- into a lower decade on the scale
- 17 lbs. from my latest goal
- down a total of ... are ya ready?!? ... 47.5 lbs....WAHOOOOOOO!!!!

I'm motivated, people, totally motivated!!

I haven't really been challenged by any food. It's funny how the thought of going to the bathroom AGAIN, curbs any potential food cravings. I did, however, have an incident yesterday. Lemme tell you about it...

I was walking from Union Station to the gym, heading north on Bay Street. Somewhere between Wellington & King streets, a gooey, chocolate ice cream waffle cone came into my line of vision. I watched that cone for at least two blocks...watched it as it was held suspended in mid-air...then as it rose to a faceless mouth...back to mid-air...back up to the mouth...and so on...you get the picture. The woman eating said cone-of-wonder, was a "biter", which decreased my respect for her. "Lickers" like myself, respect the cone. We appreciate ice cream by savouring it with every lick...stretching out the experience for as long as we can. That's why watching a "biter" is, well frankly, disgusting. It's hard to understand how a biter can devour the ice cream & cone so quickly. Oh sure, lickers' tongues get frozen, especially if we've ordered a triple scoop. But that's a small price to pay to show your appreciation & respect for the cone...and a triple scoop with Rocky Road, Heavenly Hash & Chocolate Mint DESERVES respect.

So, clearly the disgust was evident on my face. I know this because, at one point (at the light on Bay & Richmond), I actually looked up at the biter, only to discover she was looking back at me. It was pretty clear, by the look of terror on her face, that she felt I was off my rocker. Given her fear and the fact that she moved two steps away from me, I didn't feel it was an appropriate time to lecture her on the appropriate technique to appreciate her ice cream cone. Besides, the light turned green and I had to part ways with her to go down Richmond to the gym. ANYWAY, what was important here, my brothers & sisters, is not that I had a craving for an ooey-gooey ice cream waffle cone. What was REALLY important is that I was more focused on the TECHNIQUE...that's progress, right?!? And, that I didn't have the urge to push Biter into traffic and steal her cone...good for me, right?!?

Damn! Now I just want to eat a barrel of Heavenly Hash ice cream...sigh...

On that note, have a good day! It's gorgeous out there!!
(a)yt xox

Monday, May 4th 2009

The "prodigal daughter" returns...

Hola dudes & babes! Greetings from sunny, spring-like Mississauga! Another glorious day after a great weekend...lovin' it!!!

Well, it's been a while...again! Don't know what my problem is, perhaps I'm just a lazy git. But I think you're getting the picture not to expect an update every day. It's probably best this way as there isn't alot of excitement that's been happening daily. Soooo, as Pink would say (or was it The Black Eyed Peas)...let's get this party started!!!

I'm happy to say that I'm back on track, following my modified "Caveman Diet" and doing the whole suffering-for-the-cause thing in the eating department. It's been much tougher since I fell off the wagon on the 18th. I guess that's what happens. History has proven that it takes ME at least 65,000 weeks of no sugar/carbs to get rid of the cravings and I haven't quite hit that mark. I find myself still desiring anything chocolate. I resorted to having a "Swiss Chocolate" coffee yesterday, but it just didn't cut it. Once again, I'm tormented by these philosophical questions..

* "Is it wrong to push over a chubby child eating a Snickers bar? I mean, he's chubby and, if I steal his Snickers, wouldn't I be actually saving him from a future of torment & temptation ?"
* "If dark chocolate is actually good for me, wouldn't that make a dark chocolate Mars bar good for me?"

I need help, people, serious help...

I am supposed to be on this modified diet for 21 days, which started on April 13th. However, given my ... um ... fall from grace ... I've restarted the clock as of the 19th. This means my 21 days are up May 10th...less than a week. Yippee!! Does that mean I'm going to be able to eat "normal" foods again? Not ruddy likely...not according to The Evil One. What it DOES get me, is a "free meal"...a meal where I can eat whatever the hell I want to eat. AND, adding icing on the soon-to-be-eaten gooey chocolate cake, Evil One will pay for it! Truly a "free" meal. Of course, it means that I'll actually have to talk to him through the meal. Perhaps I'll turn the vice grip of torture in his direction and make him talk about his feelings...heh, heh....

So, I've been "strategizing" on what and how to eat...do I take up valuable stomach space with bread or do I blow that off? Do I waste time on alcohol or save myself the embarassment of getting drunk after 1/2 of the fru-fru umbrellaed drink? There is one thing that is clear...I need room for the most decadent dessert on the menu. So, I'm thinkin' I start with dessert and an appetizer (maybe something with bread and kill 2 birds with one stone), then see if I have room for something else. This, so far, is my best strategy. I'm open to suggestions, though, so please feel free to comment if you have any other suggestions. My objective...eat as much as I can of the food I won't see again until I reach my goal weight. Note, I don't care if I will be buzzing from a sugar high for days or if it will make me toss & turn for the entire night. I'm willing to forego that long-term pain for the shorter-term pleasure of taste bud satisfaction. I can't believe my life has come to this...fantasizing about one meal...sigh...

I've been continuing my workouts 3x/week. When I'm on my own, I still do the sandbag-over-the-shoulder thing, but I'm happy to say I haven't had to venture outside again. I'm guessing it was the "I'll kill yo momma" look I gave Evil One when he opened his mouth to suggest modifying my routine. Instead, I have added extra "drops" to the routine. Here's my latest workout:
- 15 minutes on the @!*! bike
- I pick up the bag at south side of the gym
- drop the bag in the middle of the gym, & pick it up
- drop it again & pick it up
- walk to the north end, drop the bag
- pick it up, walk to the middle of the gym, drop the bag & pick it up
- drop it again, pick it up
- walk to the south end, drop the bag (get it, 4 drops & pick ups)
- start the friggin' routine again
I do this 10 times. By the end of it, my entire middle & upper body is aching and I'm sweating profusely. Not to mention that I've inevitably broken at least one of my nails. Seriously, this whole self-improvement thing is NOT pretty!

I've set another goal for myself, having exceeded the last one by 2 lbs. OK, so I didn't "blow away" the 15 lbs-by-the-end-of-April goal, but I did lose 17lbs in total, which I'm very happy about. So, my next goal is to lose 22 lbs. by the end of July.

For those of you who don't know, we're planning a big party for my brother's 50th bday in Phoenix in the middle of July. I will be down there starting June 30th. So, basically, I must lose the 22 lbs PLUS before June 30th in anticipation of the weight I may gain when I'm on vacation. I'm not saying I'm GOING to gain weight, I'm just sayin' I need to prepare for it. Proactivity combined with acute self-awareness will get me to my end state goal...climbing the Inca Trail at my optimal weight. ONE YEAR BABY!!!

I did 40 minutes on the treadmill yesterday and then went over to Vincent's to pick up my new bike. Bless his wee heart. He gave me a bike, helmet and a bike rack for my car...nice guy, eh? I took the bike for a test run and realized I'm really uncoordinated. OK, I've always known I'm uncoordinated, but riding the bike hammered home the point. "They" say that you never forget how to ride a bike, but I think "they" are filthy liars as clearly, I've forgotten how to a) balance upon and b) ride a damn bike! Clearly, I need to "refresh my memory". Fortunately, there is a gel seat on it, so my delicate derriere will be protected. I told my friend, Andrea, I was getting a bike. She invited me to join her and her hubby Mike on their next 40 KM bike ride. I nearly threw up. I'm guessing I need to work my way up to that goal.

So, newfound goals:
- 22 lbs. by the end of July
- treadmill once/week
- bike ride as often as I can

On the career front, lots of good stuff has been going on. I now have two coaching clients..yeah! Plus, I had a great interview with the head of Transition Services for Felix Global Friday. He thinks I'm ready to do onsites, with the possibility of it moving into one-on-one transition coaching. WAY cool!

Well, it's time to go and start my day. Off to meet financial advisor extraordinaire, John, then to workout then to a comedy show tonight. I'll get to see old improviser friends, Aurora & Herbie. Should be lots of fun.

Thanx for sticking with me, poppits! You guys ROCK!!!
(a) yt xox