What's going on with ME?!?

Two weeks since my last blog?!? What is that all about?!? Seriously, it's not like I haven't had alot of great stuff going on...sheesh!

Well poppits, let me bring you up to speed on what's been going on...

As last mentioned, I was about to embark on my next adventure in eating. For 21 days, I was to eat nothing but organic chicken and organic brown rice. My intention was to do this Oct. 1 to Oct. 21st, inclusive. Then I'd put my somewhat thinner arse on a plane and head to Phoenix for a weekend of controlled decadence. Soooooo....I did eat my chicken & brown rice through Oct. 14th and lost 6 lbs. (applause, applause). Yeah for me!! I actually enjoyed being able to eat rice - seriously, it's the little things! I am quite proud of what I achieved...
1) my 6 lb. weight loss
2) regaining my self-control
3) survival through the hell that was Thanksgiving - honestly, does anyone else hear homemade butter tarts call YOUR name?!?

I was quite excited about stepping on the gym scale, seeing that weight loss...then it happened. The Evil One burst my bubble, as only he could do...

I am now living the next chapter that is the saga of my eating life. I am to eat only three meals/day of which only one of them is chicken & rice. On the positive side, I get to eat vegetables now...but no dressing. Just plain veggies and chicken...more chicken. Admittedly, I'm getting really bored with this. I know it's bad when I start fantasizing about sauces ... not chocolate, but tomato and mushroom gravy. Pathetic, isn't it?!? I went to a restaurant with a friend who ordered chicken enchiladas. I barely remember the conversation because I kept drifting off as she put the food into her mouth. Even MY imagination couldn't stretch my grilled chicken & steamed carrots into chicken enchiladas...sigh...

Now, I'm not feeling sorry for myself. I know better. But sometimes I get really frustrated with the situation. I'm being honest here. On the one hand, I know I am closer than I've ever been to my optimal weight and that, when there, it will be the most amazing accomplishment of my life. I know this and BELIEVE it will happen. However, there are times (seem like alot of times lately), when I'm at my wits end. There are times when I just want to give up and give in to the Mrs. Fields' cookie stand at Union Station. I hear people tell me two different perspectives:

- just give in to the craving, but when you do, eat within limits
- don't give in, ignore the craving and press on

I've tried both approaches and know myself well enough to know that when I give in to the craving, I NEVER eat within limits...remember my "cheat days"?!? It took me weeks to recover from the renewed cravings that took over my mind!

I guess it's all good learning, I suppose. At the end of the day, I will get through this. Honestly, melodrama aside, there are worse things that could happen to me. On the success front, I'm down 52 lbs. in total....WAY cool!! I'm the most active I've ever been in my life...also cool! It's all good....right?!?

OK, so now I feel better. I'm off to buy my organic chicken for this week. Thanx for listening, poppits!

Here's to a new week!
(a)yt xox